at least something good came of it

ORIGINAL OPERATION TRAVELER (FOR THE WEEKEND)

Got to Fortress near Muju ski resort on Saturday, possibly catch a ferry from Gunsan port to the island on Sunday.

REVISION OF OPERATION TRAVELER 1, 10/11/04 21:00

I mention that I am going to the fortress to my boss at the other school. He suggests, no, insists that his teenage son, himself and I could all go together on the Sunday (he will drive us there) if I give his son an English lesson at the same time. I gracefully accept, switching my plans to visit the island to the Saturday.

REVISI0N OF OPERATION TRAVELER 2, 11/11/04 13:00

Teacher dearest springs me a surprise belt test. I am not ready; I have not been shown all the moves and have lost some of my strength and stamina from being ill. I whine and whinged but he insists. It is to take place at 15:00 ie right smack bang in the middle of the afternoon. What an inconvenience.

NEW OBJECTIVE FOR SATURDAY

Survive the belt test and gain my yellow belt.

LOG:

I dragged myself out of bed at 12.30 and managed to get to the Dojan at 1pm. I sat watching some Japanese anime in the teacher's sleeping quarters with a 6 year old red belt while the fellas prepared the gym for the test. At 2.30 I was fumbling my way through the final practice for the test at 3pm. By 3.30 the room was filled with 100 kids (some of which are my students-I definitely I have to pass or I will be a laughing-stock for the next god-knows-how-long) and associated parents, proudly sat at the back of the gym, brandishing cameras and various other recording devices as eagerly as the kids with their swords.

Following the warm up, salute to the Korean flag etc, I was first up, along with 5 other white belts. "Louise" the teacher yelled. "ye" I replied, attempting to walk in a measured manner towards my place in the middle of the gym, with over 100 pairs of beady eyes staring expectantly at me. I bowed to the teacher, the examiner, and then to the audience, and took up my "chariot" stance. The teacher began yelling the moves (in Korean, of course, not that I had memorized any of them). The audience, examiner and fellow trainees faded away;all I could hear was the sound of my teachers voice penetrating my brain. I fumbled my way though the moves, praying they were correct. Over head cut, middle, ears, waist, left block, right diagonal, right block,left diagonal, kenjo. Side step then right leg forward bent, with left leg straight, feet at an angle but parallel, overhead kenjo. Same stance, turn, overhead kenjo. Turn again, overhead cut. ETC. Twist, diagonal slash direct into sword pointing to the sky and standing on one leg. ETC. I barely registered the camera the black belt was holding flash directly into my eyes.

Then the teacher called for "check-gun": wipe your sword and place back in case. The next thing I knew the kids starting doing various stretches and exercises for the examiner, as the teacher barked out instructions. This was completely unfamiliar to me: I tried to copy, made a mess of it. Then came the forward roll, where I was literally left standing. I was completely confused; I hadn't been trained for any of these stretches.

We bowed to the examiner, and the audience, and I resumed my place at the back of the gym, almost deaf to the cheers of encouragement from the spectators.

I had failed. I just knew it. I was mortified. In front of my students as well. I am a foreigner in Korea, I stick out like a sore thumb, I have had my face in the paper (my boss has been advertising the hagwon) and EVERYONE KNOWS ME. WITH NO EXHAGGERAION, IN GUNSAN, I AM FAMOUS.

2 hours later, following the pomp and glory of the teacher and the examiner showing off their swanky moves by slicing through bamboo shoots to the amazement of a captivated audience, I was invited as an honoured guest to an eating house by the examiner, accompanied by his wife, children and my teacher. Assuming that I had failed I just concentrated on eating. Not that I actually ate much. Every single creature that could have come out of the Sea of Japan was laid on the table. Things had eyes and feelers, and some things were still writhing and twitching. I came close to heaving. The examiners wife looked at me with concern. "I don't like fish" I explained, even though the fish wasn't the problem, it was my squeamishness.

Afterwards I went to the PC Bang, then to bed, ashamed. At least I had the fortress to look forward to.

Sunday morning I was out of bed at and ready for 9.30am, as promised to meet with my other boss outside my apartment. By 10am he did not show. I phoned his mobile. I he was still in bed. 'I have classes today, sorry' was the explanation. I was furious. Why did he not phone me earlier on in the week to let me know???? I made the decision that when I see him next I will be deaf to any further promises of day trips, as he is clearly unreliable. After all, the fortress will always be there for him; I have only 10 months left here, and soon the snow will be settling in. I went back to bed in a hump.

Midday Paula phoned, wanting to know what my plans are. After explaining that everything I had planned to do had gone tits-up, I resolved to buy the thick hooded fleece that I saw in the shop by her apartment, whereupon she offered to come with me. After that we went for a walk round Eunpa lake then back to hers for cakes she had bought in Seoul (proper European cream and everything!) and TV.

Today, I went back to Kumdo. My teacher approached me, yellow belt in hand. "Good job, Louise".

I HAD PASSED!!!!. Though I am to perform the stretches on my own next time.

So something good came out of the whole thing after all!